Description: As you can see from the images included below, this is an Authentic faux Vintage working meat lamp, lined with red fuzzy fake fur and covered in doggie squeeky toys. It is a one-of-a-kind-item, hand made by a starving artist in Baltimore. It gives off a lovely glow, and sets an appropriate mood for almost any situation. Approximately 2′ in height.

Background: Two years ago I fell madly in love with a woman from Baltimore. About a month after the relationship began, which was about a month before my obsessive possessiveness drove her to leave me, I celebrated my 29th birthday. She declined to come visit me on my birthday (which led to a sad, shameful birthday, drowning out my sorrows in lap dances from a punk-rock junky girl at a local strip club). However, the Baltimore girl showed up two weeks later with this gift, the meat lamp.

I prefer to barter for anything you feel would be a fair trade. I will also consider selling for $50 and a hug.

I don’t think I’ve ever wanted anything as much in my entire life as I want this.

Craigslist: I Can See Clearly Now, The Meat Lamp Is On