By proclamation of Governor Edward G. Rendell, beginning today and following through each and every subsequent May 14th in honor of “the iconic sweet treat sold at roadside stands and farmer’s markets throughout the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania,” we will all join together as Pennsylvania residents, our faces and hands covered in sticky molasses, and celebrate Shoofly Pie Day!

Betcha didn’t know you’d been living in Shoofly Pie country all along. Well, maybe you did. But I betcha didn’t know you’d be celebrating it today, May 14th! Since the origin of Shoofly Pie is most commonly traced to the Pennsylvania Dutch, the Pennsylvania Tourism Office has chosen it to be, like, the thing that will make people want to come to Pennsylvania. The pie, people! You can’t keep the damn flies away, that’s how good this shit is. Come and get it!

The plan is kind of a three-fold Tourism dynamo, with the pie, a webseries, The Peter Arthur Stories, and a Pennsylvacation Sweepstakes through which you can win one of twelve PA getaways by answering some trivia questions about the webseries. And it all begins today, people. The web series follows a 20-something young man while he searches for his first love, a waitress at a diner who once served him the best piece of Shoofly pie he’d ever eaten. A story we can all relate to, right, guys? I can almost see her now…blonde hair, blue eyes, her light, simple perfume mixing with the sweet, molasses-y smell of the Shoofly pie…Her waitressy self, just hanging out and being a waitress. Those were the days of our lives. 

So, in summation, Happy Shoofly Pie Day. If you think the pie is gross you might as well move to Jersey right now. We don’t need your kind here.